strangers calling
So now a strange woman calls my cell phone with a name and number asking me to call. She sounds like a middle level officiary, a frontline worker in the world whose job involves polite veiled threats. Like yesterday's caller, her message gave no incentive. I think I'd need to hear words like "we have money for you."
It's pretty clear they want the opposite. One unanswered phone call colours my whole morning with tension. The dogs are barking at everything now because of my tension. I'm startling at little things and sitting on pins. Just from these phone calls from strangers who won't leave a message beyond "call me." Yeah, why in hell would I do that? Are you offering me a business opportunity? Hiring me for a job? Offering me coupons for chocolate? Calling to give me a compliment? By the time I get this tension out of my system (and today Dan's home so I am sure I won't) that phone will probably ring again to restart it.
How do people do it? How do they get all this killer tension out of their systems fast enough to keep up? I'm in tears here! Dan's going to keep snapping at the dogs and me, so we'll be a yelling house by afternoon. Maybe when Dan finishes that video I can communicate, somehow, that I fear his being mindlessly snappy will make things even worse. okay, I took five and talked to him and he handled it better than ever before. I had to make him stand still to hear me. What's that about? I start talking and he starts walking? Sheesh. Seriously, I started to explain things and first he started turning towards his chair. I stopped him. He held up the ipad to ask about it, I told him it was his and pay attention. he starts turning towards the basement. I caught him up short, told him to stand still and listen. Why? Why would this man require so many corrections to simply pay a minute of respect to his wife? I wish I could spank his mother for this but she paid the price already living with his father. His father should have been spanked too. he's dead now, the nasty old creep, and everyone's happier. I will not spill Dan's family business in my blog so you just won't get to know what was nasty about him or why I called him creep. It's enough to know he created a stereotypical abusive home for his family.
I like Dan's mom, she's a sweet lady. Just the type of woman who stays with an abusive cretin, justifying his behaviour and subjecting her kids to him for their entire life. They're always sweet women (unless you catch them in the midst of substance abuse) and that's the kind of woman abusers seek out and cultivate.
We're helping her with one of her two mortgages. They took out loans to cover medical costs as himself died and now the widow gets to sit in the bills in her 80s. We pay one of the mortgage payments every month. I don't know how much that money would help with our bills. 6k/yr isn't that much on our debt anyway. About the amount of interest we accumulate I suppose. I was wondering yesterday just how long that mortgage amortization period is but there's no way to find out. Asking would just create all kinds of tension. I don't plan on trying to ask Dan to stop sending the money either. I just guess I realized we're on that bill, a monthly mortgage payment for a house we don't use, for potentially twenty years. Because being crushed by your own bills alone is just so gauche...
It's pretty clear they want the opposite. One unanswered phone call colours my whole morning with tension. The dogs are barking at everything now because of my tension. I'm startling at little things and sitting on pins. Just from these phone calls from strangers who won't leave a message beyond "call me." Yeah, why in hell would I do that? Are you offering me a business opportunity? Hiring me for a job? Offering me coupons for chocolate? Calling to give me a compliment? By the time I get this tension out of my system (and today Dan's home so I am sure I won't) that phone will probably ring again to restart it.
How do people do it? How do they get all this killer tension out of their systems fast enough to keep up? I'm in tears here! Dan's going to keep snapping at the dogs and me, so we'll be a yelling house by afternoon. Maybe when Dan finishes that video I can communicate, somehow, that I fear his being mindlessly snappy will make things even worse. okay, I took five and talked to him and he handled it better than ever before. I had to make him stand still to hear me. What's that about? I start talking and he starts walking? Sheesh. Seriously, I started to explain things and first he started turning towards his chair. I stopped him. He held up the ipad to ask about it, I told him it was his and pay attention. he starts turning towards the basement. I caught him up short, told him to stand still and listen. Why? Why would this man require so many corrections to simply pay a minute of respect to his wife? I wish I could spank his mother for this but she paid the price already living with his father. His father should have been spanked too. he's dead now, the nasty old creep, and everyone's happier. I will not spill Dan's family business in my blog so you just won't get to know what was nasty about him or why I called him creep. It's enough to know he created a stereotypical abusive home for his family.
I like Dan's mom, she's a sweet lady. Just the type of woman who stays with an abusive cretin, justifying his behaviour and subjecting her kids to him for their entire life. They're always sweet women (unless you catch them in the midst of substance abuse) and that's the kind of woman abusers seek out and cultivate.
We're helping her with one of her two mortgages. They took out loans to cover medical costs as himself died and now the widow gets to sit in the bills in her 80s. We pay one of the mortgage payments every month. I don't know how much that money would help with our bills. 6k/yr isn't that much on our debt anyway. About the amount of interest we accumulate I suppose. I was wondering yesterday just how long that mortgage amortization period is but there's no way to find out. Asking would just create all kinds of tension. I don't plan on trying to ask Dan to stop sending the money either. I just guess I realized we're on that bill, a monthly mortgage payment for a house we don't use, for potentially twenty years. Because being crushed by your own bills alone is just so gauche...