hot and cold
I get chilly, but without warning, a burn steals over me from my core, and I flush out in sweat, and it takes too long too cool down. I get soaked. It's very random. It sometimes comes along with the ache from my tumour, but mostly it's just completely unpredictable. I've tried googling but there's no explanation out there for it. I guess tumours can do that? It's an endocrine type tumour I read, that colorectal and some others can flood you with hormones, and mess up your system. I'm also having a lot more pain. The damn thing aches if I try and do anything related to walking or standing, and even sitting, I need to be utterly relaxed, chill, zen, like nearly asleep. That can be hard because my belly is constantly fighting and freaking out, constipated, gas, pain and movement. I still get extremely disgusted by the bag of shit on my stomach. I can't fathom ever taking it as normal even now. Dan's back into a nice mode. ...