The next 50 years

I have this head cold, see.  It's unusual, I've never had one like this, but like all head colds it's extremely annoying!  I'll feel on the verge of a sneeze, complete with facial twitches and watering eyes.  No matter how often I blow my nose or hold my sinus closed by pressing on the bridge of my nose, it wouldn't go away! I've been powering on the garlic, the coldfx, the assorted vitamins, etc., but got ill nonetheless!  Last week it was my back. I had cramps from my shoulders to my forehead, the kind of headache, neck ache, and back ache, that I got the time I had meningitis for 24 hours, about 16 years ago.  I suffered that experience alone, there was nobody to say 'hey, lets get you to ER" so I didn't go till I was feeling a lot better. At that point, there was nothing to see and I was dismissed by the doctor. I was at a walk-in clinic, not ER.  But I remember how that pain felt and this week, especially when it deepened to include my lower ba...

I have a potluck party tomorrow, and I intend to attend.  Not sure what I'll bring for alcohol, but I have a pack of mixed nuts thingy, and I'm going to dip marzipan balls in chocolate, and assemble sliced smoked turkey, sliced spiced gouda, and stuffed olives on toothpicks.  I'll put them on a platter with some fancy crackers.  That ought to suffice for my contribution, eh? I'm worried about my health.  Twice now they've cancelled chemo because my neutrophils were low and this week they're lower than last, not higher!  I'm having nasty back aches, headaches, neck aches, and have a swollen gland in my neck.  My chronic toothache got a bit scary on the weekend but I managed to stop clenching my teeth the last two nights so that's better. It has a direct connection to clenching, so I figure the problem is uneven pressure due to the missing tooth below it.  It can get bad enough to actually put a blister of pus in the roof of my mouth, a sinus that drain...

It's driving me batty!  I've been the best friend I know how to be and still I'm accused of judgmental and insulting behaviour!!! I remember when it started.  I used the word stupid to reference an idea in a post my friend shared and next thing you know I'm saying that person is stupid and nothing I can say or do to defend myself is valid. It's infuriating! I could apologize, as I've done repeatedly in the past with this person, but at some point they've got to learn to quit raking me over the coals for their own head trips! It's cruel to me!  Nearest I can figure, I represent the better parts of the person who abused my friend, and so my friend projects the nasty parts of that other onto me as well! Then like Don Quixote goes at me, tilting full gallop with lowered lance screaming anger at me for some perceived slight I never made. I've got this abusive husband poking and provoking me when I seem at peace or happy.  Then there's the friend who...

I have managed two vlogs in a row, two days in a row!  That's cool.  I've missed the first four days of DE in which two were weekends and I won't post if Dan's home because he just doesn't give me the space to yap to a camera.  It's hard enough to get six seconds for a vine (well vine's dead now but for nearly 3 years I did it a lot).  yeah, he's so damn oblivious to me that way.  Doesn't frankly care.  What's in his head feels more important so it therefor is.  So far the side effects of the chemo are pretty manageable. The cold intolerance is quite annoying and needs some workarounds but it fades off in week two when I'm on a chemo break and I'm hoping that doesn't change.  the weather has taken a turn for the cold so I'm not getting much car driving time in. I might try anyway today just because my trip is as much across town as it's possible to go.  I've got a second pilates class today. I can hardly remember the exerc...