still waiting on colonoscopy, last week to go
Oh I'm hearing dire things about how my innards may be damaged and what they do to you when they are. Entire bowels removed and replaced by external bags, for instance. Ick. NO no no. I don't believe it! But getting my system moving and working again just might be a lot more work than I realize. I keep thinking if i start working on my abs and massaging, and eat the right things in the right proportions, I can heal it.But it doesn't sound like anyone in the world has a plan for that. Doctors seem to tell you to go on permanent laxatives even though we know laxatives ruin the bowel's motility over time! So what, you just give up on ever having natural motility again? that doesn't make sense to me. So I have a lot of learning ahead of me. I will have to study the problem from various angles and formulate a solution from scratch. After all, I'm dealing with doctors who happily tell patience to suck on sugar water with a vitamin pill it, and neglect to mention something as wholesome as coconut water. Yes, I will be trying to tell them, but no, they won't listen. Well they might. Who knows?
We went to the store monday for stuff from the pharmacy and stuff from the grocery. In the pharmacy they had these giant chocolate lindt bars. Massive! Dark chocolate! I mistakenly thought the bar inside was full sized but in fact it's a collection of regular bars in a giant package. A bit disappointing and yet better too. So I took them out and kept the giant package decorating the kitchen awhile longer and had a couple little bits of the 85% bar. There's so little sugar in it, it's second to last on the list, behind the vanilla bean.
I tried to eat about a half ounce of chicken breast and a bit of skin last night and immediately got sick in the belly. So I guess meat is too much digestion to ask of my system for the next however long. Cheese and eggs are working great. I made lemonade, and there's kambucha, tea, broth, coconut water, and some juice coconut water blends. I mentally guestimated my calories and I'm probably taking in an average of a thousand a day, so that's plenty and explains why my weight has quit dropping. My stomach is all bloated though.
Okay, so my spirits are level, nothing particularily cheery, but not depressed either. A bit angry, a lot worried, and if I stop to think about next tuesday's appt., scared.
and now I have to run to the toilet so I"ll just post this.
We went to the store monday for stuff from the pharmacy and stuff from the grocery. In the pharmacy they had these giant chocolate lindt bars. Massive! Dark chocolate! I mistakenly thought the bar inside was full sized but in fact it's a collection of regular bars in a giant package. A bit disappointing and yet better too. So I took them out and kept the giant package decorating the kitchen awhile longer and had a couple little bits of the 85% bar. There's so little sugar in it, it's second to last on the list, behind the vanilla bean.
I tried to eat about a half ounce of chicken breast and a bit of skin last night and immediately got sick in the belly. So I guess meat is too much digestion to ask of my system for the next however long. Cheese and eggs are working great. I made lemonade, and there's kambucha, tea, broth, coconut water, and some juice coconut water blends. I mentally guestimated my calories and I'm probably taking in an average of a thousand a day, so that's plenty and explains why my weight has quit dropping. My stomach is all bloated though.
Okay, so my spirits are level, nothing particularily cheery, but not depressed either. A bit angry, a lot worried, and if I stop to think about next tuesday's appt., scared.
and now I have to run to the toilet so I"ll just post this.