fringe vendor
I did it, sent in my application for a vendor's spot on Broadway. I didn't realize those were saved spots, but I should have. I guess I just didn't think past "need a busker's license to vend." Well in fact they have a separate setup for vendors vs entertainers! I could do it with a blanket but I want to do it with a table so I picked spots in the area across from the theatre where the table vendors always set up. I had to pick 3 spots and see what I get. I dont know if I'll like the neighbors but I expect we all watch out for each other on breaks and I can probably just have an extra blanket to toss over my stuff for bathroom breaks.
I sat and did some estimates on how much stock I might make and for what I might sell it. I could get enough to take care of the costs of selling it at least. Let me not put numbers in my blog, since it's more private than even my innermost thoughts. Well, only because it's much more useful in causing me grief than simply knowing how to hurt my feelings. Your esteem has to matter to me for you to hurt my feelings. Since I assume you won't appreciate, understand, or enjoy me, it's not important to worry about what you think of me. I already know you don't like me. I'm shocked when someone does.
I tell you, this day of mental health is driving me crazy. it makes me dwell too much on how my life differs not only from others, and the status quo definition of how it should be, but also from how I'd rather have it. I would like more people in my life, but not people who use and abuse me. That's the trick, isn't it? When you are so casually rude, arrogant, self centered, and just plain socially oblivious to everyone around you, how can you expect anything else? I see it in Dan, and my father was like that. It's more acceptable in a male character. It can even be seen as a positive character trait, if a bit annoying. In a woman it's quite unforgiveable. I've given up. It's my personality and I can't change it. it comes with the autism and ADHD and there's nothing I can do about it.
Depression? Does it count as depression when it has clear causes in the form of unmet needs? Would you call a lonely puppy "clinically depressed" even when he went off his food and just cried all day? Is that mental illness? Well I'm a lonely puppy. One husband and one friend isn't doing it for me. I need family, dammit. I need to be able to go drop in on people when I'm in the right mind to socialize, and they've got to see something worthwhile in me when I do. I need community, not this fractured neighborhood of disordered and disconnected strangers. I hope moving to a tiny house iin Vancouver gives me access to that. If only through attending pagan religious events! I mean, there's just bugger all here. Those who are here are really cliquey. They don't lift a finger for each other either. Well, that's not exactly as bad anymore, there's some newer folks around with a more open way, but they kind of pushed me away, real gentle like. It's amazing how well they do that. I don't even know why, I can't have been that annoying? So maybe it will be the same in Vancouver but given that it took me 25 years to run out of groups to try and join here, maybe I'll get a few good years of feeling like a person out there anyway. Winter sucks, you know? I need more boxes to paint.
I sat and did some estimates on how much stock I might make and for what I might sell it. I could get enough to take care of the costs of selling it at least. Let me not put numbers in my blog, since it's more private than even my innermost thoughts. Well, only because it's much more useful in causing me grief than simply knowing how to hurt my feelings. Your esteem has to matter to me for you to hurt my feelings. Since I assume you won't appreciate, understand, or enjoy me, it's not important to worry about what you think of me. I already know you don't like me. I'm shocked when someone does.
I tell you, this day of mental health is driving me crazy. it makes me dwell too much on how my life differs not only from others, and the status quo definition of how it should be, but also from how I'd rather have it. I would like more people in my life, but not people who use and abuse me. That's the trick, isn't it? When you are so casually rude, arrogant, self centered, and just plain socially oblivious to everyone around you, how can you expect anything else? I see it in Dan, and my father was like that. It's more acceptable in a male character. It can even be seen as a positive character trait, if a bit annoying. In a woman it's quite unforgiveable. I've given up. It's my personality and I can't change it. it comes with the autism and ADHD and there's nothing I can do about it.
Depression? Does it count as depression when it has clear causes in the form of unmet needs? Would you call a lonely puppy "clinically depressed" even when he went off his food and just cried all day? Is that mental illness? Well I'm a lonely puppy. One husband and one friend isn't doing it for me. I need family, dammit. I need to be able to go drop in on people when I'm in the right mind to socialize, and they've got to see something worthwhile in me when I do. I need community, not this fractured neighborhood of disordered and disconnected strangers. I hope moving to a tiny house iin Vancouver gives me access to that. If only through attending pagan religious events! I mean, there's just bugger all here. Those who are here are really cliquey. They don't lift a finger for each other either. Well, that's not exactly as bad anymore, there's some newer folks around with a more open way, but they kind of pushed me away, real gentle like. It's amazing how well they do that. I don't even know why, I can't have been that annoying? So maybe it will be the same in Vancouver but given that it took me 25 years to run out of groups to try and join here, maybe I'll get a few good years of feeling like a person out there anyway. Winter sucks, you know? I need more boxes to paint.