Problem solving: some wisdom

"They're crazy."  "They're just trying to tell everyone what to do (power tripping.)" "They're evil."  All of these answers to a problem are brick walls.  They don't contribute to the conversation.  My husband will argue the defeatist point if I don't accept it, as though the point of the chatter is to argue one's point, rather than to examine the issue brought up.  You ponder what made a driver lose control, or why a family is battling officials instead of moving, and he ascribes the motive to something like drinking, insanity, or power tripping.  If that's the motive, then the solution can only be removal of the squeaky wheel and dumping it.  As though the wheel has no value because it's the one making noise, and it's utter replaceable.  That's an american thing, isn't it?  "Why try and fix it since it's probably too poor quality and replacement is easy?"
but you don't learn.  You don't solve.  You just slap in a new part and toss the old part on a growing mountain of problems.  You disregard the value of the people involved and give them no audience to share their concerns.  You put no respect into the conversation.  You shut it down and monopolize it with a speech on desolate topics of finalized failure.  The growing mountain of squeaky wheels soon includes you.  Eventually, there are only squeaky wheels and an avalanche of them destroys the unmoving cart.
No, you must find out, you must give air to the words and needs of others, if only in your imagination, to learn what is it to be someone else.  Only when you understand where they're truly coming from, even if it's a power grab, can you find a solution instead of a patch.