when heroes aren't born

Tuesday, june 25, 2024

Oh we are used to my long breaks in writing, aren't we?

Fill in the details: I am living in my bus yet, on a street in North Vancouver.  I've found a spot they'll allow me to stay.  The brakes are dangerous now. I can't be driving unless it's at 4 am to the shop for the brake job.  For which I am trying to save. However, the dog spent $160 of it yesterday for an infected toe.  So that's how savings often goes. 

Financially, I've switched from 965 from Saskatchewan disability to 600 on BC nobody rates.  I have an appointment with a doctor but no idea if they'll help with my disability status.  Doctors are busy.  So the money hasn't gotten better yet.  Likewise my anxiety.  

I was realizing today I've never lived in a high rise; only houses and once an antique 4 storey walkup brick building in a ground floor with private entrance.  Oh, and once a 6 storey version of the same.  My parents house was the newest at 196? rivalling the house I owned which was 196? also. Usually, they were 1920s era buildings or older and I do love the old places very much.

I do think it may be that I will never be housed again. The obstacles to housing have become pretty obscene.  You need as much money as once was needed for a mortgage down payment.  You need references and rental history. You need a credit score. You have to be never home and own no pets nor have children and if you are in the place, nobody notices unless a drain flushes.

So I am concentrating on fixing the bus and praying she can be brought up to standards and pass an inspection.  It's less expensive than the deposit on a home. Once she's working well, and I get better at storing, perhaps moving around more becomes an option. But that's part of the issue too.  The laws around parking and driving hither and thither have been tightened considerably over the last decade to where it's a miracle I have a spot at all, much less one I can stay in.

Today was a trying day. I was ok when I got to the laundromat and parked.  Rolled down the windows, gave thanks to the shady tree and walked off, doggy doing her screaming from the back of the car.  Immediately I was accosted by a would be hero about leaving my dog  "locked in a hot car."  He was already on the phone to 911 by then. I pointed out that the car was not locked. The windows were open and the spot was in the shade.  Nope, irrelevant, he could hear the dog crying so obviously I should just leave her home.  (clearly not a dog person, just a karen taking advantage for a virtue signalling story later)  Well he's on the phone to the police, I'm shouting to be heard that the car is in the shade and open.  Finally I tell him, as I go tend my errand, not to steal my dog or break my car.  When I returned, no sign of life except the dog.  We went for a walk and I changed over the laundry and sat with her awhile.  She wasn't allowed in London Drugs, and running her back home to the HOT BUS so I could stop in a drugstore is dumb.  She was fine.  Anyway, walking back from down the street I saw a firetruck parked beside my car, lights flashing, but they left long before my laundry was done and I kept away.  Dog was with me.  No ticket on the window later, nor anything, so fine. I did nothing wrong.  I do understand about hot cars. I also know there are these jerks taking advantage. I just didn't expect it with the shady tree and the open windows.

Then I tried to salvage the day by going to see the Lynn Canyon suspension bridge. That one hasn't got a fee to see.  I thas got pay parking with no way to pay cash, however.  So after 45 mins negotiating heavy traffic and not using maps, I turned around and went home. I can say the driving was interesting. I got a better idea of the layout and how there are even business districts well up the mountain side.  I've been driving around by guess, using other drivers now and then to lead me on side routes.  You can tell.  We're all approaching a traffic snarl and suddenly that one makes a turn, you know, the street is wide enough and has the lights, so you follow. They know when to turn right or left to get back off the detour and bypass the snarl.  It's kind of fun seeking out roads like that.  Busy side roads are my fave because I can afford to look out at the view in the slow speed.  This place has the views!  At one point, up the top of Lonsdale, where I went for exploratory purposes, I could see Mount Baker as if it was in Burnaby, so wild.  I could see all the islands and the whole city, it was too bad I couldn't stop and gawp.

I keep wondering what sort of home I will wind up in but nothing yet seems real. They are all interesting anyway.  I'd like a 4 story walkup 1 bdrm on a merchant street with grocery stores and cafes and all that groovy stuff we see in little Persia and little Italy, for example.  But without vermin.  See, that's immediately out of my price range. The vermin part.  Poor people have to live with rats, roaches and bed bugs, as if it's an incentive to work harder for better housing.  As if that ever actually worked. All those rich guys nattering on about their hard work are aggrandizing. It wasn't "work."  it was just time. Just lots and lots of their attention and time. They frequently don't even know what it feels like to have aching muscles. 

Hard work is the province of poor men, not rich.

Well mostly i just had to talk about the hero on the sidewalk making my day worse.  At one point he said I was being aggressive and I said, no, that's the sound of fear and stress. You are bringing fear and stress into my day just so you can be a hero.  He insisted he was just worried about the dog "locked in a hot car."  "it's in the shade with the windows open!" I retorted.  If the dog wouldn't have been wailing when I walked away that would have helped.  At once point he was "I can her her crying!"  Like Dan, the sound of a crying dog must immediately be addressed by giving the dog whatever it wants. This, in fact, is why she still does it. He responds just frequently enough that she's been trained to scream for attention.

What will do on laundry day next month?  I'm going to either leave her behind or use the cover on the car to shortcut the attention.  Plus I am installing a huge thermometer to show everyone the temperature in the car. I happen to have one that's perfect.

ok, well.  Blog entry complete?